4 Tips for Comforting the Hurting People in Your Life

5 Mins read

As a believer in Christ, one of the most important things that you will ever do is to provide comfort to those who are facing pain. In today’s world, pain is everywhere. In addition to the kinds of pain that people have been facing forever, we’re now trying to navigate our way through a virus that has ravaged the world and continues to mutate. On top of fears about personal health, millions of people are grieving the loss of loved ones while also trying to deal with the economic ramifications. Pain is everywhere.

It’s important to understand that you don’t have to wait for your pain to end before you can comfort others (a principle that we will discuss more later in today’s study). Instead, God’s people are called to be carriers of peace to the hurting around us at all times.

For some of us, comforting others who are facing painful times can be awkward. If you’re not comfortable with showing emotions yourself, it can be difficult to deal with others who are in an emotionally vulnerable state. However, that’s not a good enough reason to shy away from bringing peace to those around you who are facing pain. If you’re not sure how to go about truly comforting others, consider starting with these 4 tips.

Remember That You’ve Been Comforted

2 Corinthians 1:4 (TPT)
He always comes alongside us to comfort us in every suffering so that we can come alongside those who are in any painful trial. We can bring them this same comfort that God has poured out upon us. And just as we experience the abundance of Christ’s own sufferings, even more of God’s comfort will cascade upon us through our union with Christ.

The most elementary way that you can go about comforting others is to draw on the times where God has comforted you. God’s comfort comes about in two ways. First of all, since we are the temple of the Holy Spirit, we can experience the supernatural comfort of God. There are times where His peace becomes so abundant and so real in our own lives that we experience great comfort simply through His presence. Secondly, we experience God’s comfort through other believers who have come alongside us to comfort us in times of pain.

When you remember the painful times in your own life and how God comforted you, you can be in position to effectively comfort others. While none of us want to experience pain in our own lives, it is worth noting that those times of pain can serve as a way for us to learn to comfort others. You can’t empathize with someone who is suffering if you have never suffered. However, once you’ve experienced hardship and felt the comfort of God, you’re in a better position to effectively share that comfort with other people. Look for points of commonality with people around you who are suffering and build from that.

You Have the Comforter Inside You

John 14:26 (KJV)
But the Comforter, which is the Holy Ghost, whom the Father will send in my name, he shall teach you all things, and bring all things to your remembrance, whatsoever I have said to you.

When you’re approaching someone who is dealing with immense pain, it’s easy to assume that you’re not equipped to help them. Perhaps you’re dealing with someone who has recently lost a spouse to an unexpected death. If you’ve never been in that position, you may think that someone else is better equipped to help them since you haven’t been in their shoes. However, since you have the Holy Spirit, who Christ referred to as “the Comforter” living inside you, you are equipped.

When you go to someone who is facing unimaginable pain, remember that the comfort that you provide doesn’t come from you. While God is using you as a vessel to bring comfort to others, He is the provider of the comfort. The Comforter is inside you, and God will bring the words that He has spoken to your remembrance so that you can comfort others.

Ultimately, the comfort that you provide doesn’t come from you. It’s easy to assume that you need to have all the answers. However, when you live your life in submission to the Holy Spirit, He provides the comfort to the people around you.

Don’t Wait for Personal Peace

James 1:2-3 (TPT)
My fellow believers, when it seems as though you are facing nothing but difficulties, see it as an invaluable opportunity to experience the greatest joy that you can! For you know that when your faith is tested it stirs up power within you to endure all things.

We often assume that our lives have to be in a place of perfect peace before we can comfort others who are suffering. However, if you’re waiting on a time where you’re experiencing no hardship to comfort others, you will probably never be a carrier of peace. There is always something wrong somewhere in your life. With that in mind, it’s up to you to push through those moments of personal pain so you can more effectively comfort others.

As God’s people, we have the peace of Christ living inside us. However, Christ’s peace doesn’t mean that we are exempt from all troubles. Instead, it simply means that we don’t become so focused on our pain that we forget about His peace. God’s peace is strong enough that it defies our natural logic and allows us to experience peace in the middle of pain.

Even if things in your life aren’t going perfectly, you can still bring peace to others. Why? Because your peace that doesn’t come and go based on your circumstances. Additionally, hurting people will be drawn to you by the fact that you can bring peace while suffering pain in your own life.

Look for Practical Ways to Help

Matthew 25:35-36 (TPT)
For when you saw me hungry, you fed me. When you found me thirsty, you gave me something to drink. When I had no place to stay you invited me in, and when I was poorly clothed, you covered me. When I was sick you tenderly cared for me, and when I was in prison you visited me.

Finally, and perhaps most importantly, you can comfort others simply by taking a practical approach to doing so. While it’s important that you pray with and for people who are suffering and provide a Scriptural insight when the opportunity arises, it’s even more effective when you can take some practical steps to bring some comfort to people.

When you know that someone is facing a difficult time such as the loss of loved one, consider fixing dinner and taking it to them. When a family is going through the pain of a funeral service, they may feel like they have more on their plate than they can handle. When you take some practical steps in order to make their burden a little lighter, it’s a way of providing the kind of comfort that they truly need. Look for practical ways to care for the people around you who are hurting.

A Closing Prayer:

Heavenly Father, help me to be a carrier of comfort to the people around me who are facing pain in their lives today. I know that they are suffering, and while my life is far from completely peaceful, I know that Your Spirit lives inside me, and that You are the true source of comfort for me and the people in my life. In Christ’s name, Amen.

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