Relational Boundaries
For anyone who has ever owned a home before, you may be well aware of the importance of regular maintenance. In the beginning, it might seem like some appliances or parts of the home are fine to put off until another time. As the furnace breaks down, we find ourselves switching over to electric wall heaters. As the dishwasher breaks down, we find ourselves switching over to hand washing our dishes. If the roof springs a leak, we just put a bucket out to catch the water. As a hole gets punched through our wall, we cover it up with a picture. As the floor begins to give way underneath us, we begin to walk around it. All of these scenarios and more can start out small, but it will create a world of problems if regular maintenance is not done on our homes.
For the homeowner, staying on top of repairs is important. Falling behind will prove to be costly. If regular maintenance is not done, the homeowner may fall so far behind that it seems impossible to restore his home back to what it once was.
Regular maintenance must also be done in the life of the Christian. We must continually examine ourselves and ask what needs to be fixed or tended to. If we do not take an honest look, we may find ourselves at what feels like the point of no return. If we write off certain areas of our lives as less important than others for us to correct, we will soon experience the devastating effects. Other areas can begin to suffer as well, and it is hard to find the strength to fix what we have become.
Where to look for repairs
This is not an exhaustive article on the topic of where to look for repairs. This subject is seemingly an endless one and cannot be plumbed entirely. The length of this article will find its focus on Psalm 1 and the instruction found within.
This psalm makes much of that which we allow into our hearts and lives. It is a telling psalm about the way that what we watch and listen to and focus on will affect the direction and the course of our lives. The psalm first shows us of our need to be on guard against the company we keep. Then it shows us of our need to be continually in God’s Word.
Maintaining our relationships
It seems like people will find a loophole for just about anything in God’s Word. Someone who wants to use drugs may say that the Bible doesn’t talk about them; it only talks about alcohol. The person who gets angry a lot may say his anger is righteous anger. The person who is greedy with his money may say the Bible talks about saving for our children. The habitual sinner may say that even Paul said in Romans 7 that he had a sin problem. The self-focused or lazy person might say that he needs to first take care of himself if he’s going to be able to focus on others.
I say this to say that people will find a loophole to continue in their destructive relationships. They might say, “Well, Jesus sat down and ate with sinners.” This statement is true. Jesus did do that, and we also have a ministry to the lost, but it is a ministry with parameters and warnings. The Bible is very clear:
• Sinners entice us (Prov. 1:10).
• Bad company will corrupt good morals (1 Cor. 15:33).
• It is possible to be tempted even as we try to help (Gal. 6:1).
Walking with unhealthy influences
In verse 1 of Psalm 1, we see the descent of the individual who centers himself around bad influences. This psalm begins by talking of the man who walks among the wicked and listens to what they have to say. The word used concerning their talk is “counsel.” This speaks of a life-changing conversation. A life-directing conversation.
Psalm 1 tells of the way that someone begins to center himself around bad influences. Here we see a person who walks – who goes in and out of the presence of bad companions but does not remain there. This may be how we would start to place ourselves around bad company. We may not start by spending a lot of time around someone that will bring us down, but we can see the natural progression.
Standing with unhealthy influences
As time progresses, we will find ourselves getting more firmly fixed. Standing rather than moving in and out is what becomes more of the norm. This man in Psalm 1 now finds himself standing with sinners. He is getting comfortable. However, the descent is not complete.
Sitting with unhealthy influences
Finally, after a period of time that is not mentioned, we find ourselves sitting within the very seat that scoffers sit in. This is about as fixed as we could get. At this point, we are very comfortable. Like the disciples that sat with Jesus in the upper room and John who reclined on the Savior, we too find ourselves sitting with others, but with those that will drag us down. We find ourselves sitting much like Lot, who was sitting at the gate of Sodom in the seat of sinners (Gen. 19:1). We, like Lot, can be a believer, but after a time not appear like one because of the company we have decided to keep.
Maintaining time with the Lord
An important way to interpret the first and second verse of Psalm 1 is by recognizing that the underlying implications of it are that taking in good and not taking in bad are essential to growing and flourishing in the Lord. This principle is then given some teeth by pointing us to not allowing bad influences in (their words, practices, habits, likes, dislikes, etc.) but rather taking in God’s Word.
Making sure we spend time with the Lord in His Word will lead to a flourishing lifestyle. However, it is important to note the wording used in this psalm. In speaking of God’s Word, the psalmist says that we are to delight in it and meditate on it day and night. What this means is that we are to treasure it and allow it to be the focus of our attention and our thoughts throughout the entirety of the day. Day is from sun up to sun down. Night is from sun down to sun up. This means that at all times we are to be meditating and thinking on God’s Word and allowing it to influence our lives rather than bad company or unhealthy influences.
Final prayer
Father, I thank You for the guidance You have given me in Your Word. Help me to place myself around other Christians who are going to build me up. In Jesus’ name, Amen.